SO I’M GETTING DEPORTED

You may have noticed that I haven’t been updating the site very much lately. Well, there’s a reason for that. I got myself deported by the Chilean government.  Yes, this is the most SMPhH worthy thing that I’ve probably ever done.  I’ve been legally cleared to discuss it, so here it is…

Short story goes like this…somebody from the Chilean International Police read my posts about Mini-Chooch.  If you don’t know who Mini-Chooch is, then you need to read my posts more often.  ICYMI, Mini-Chooch is my cloned Carlos Ruiz (done in Bolivia).  It turns out that human cloning is very frowned upon here in Chile.

I’m not that broken up about moving back to the States, because I’ll get to see family and Philly sports again.  Mrs. Phan is pissed though.  We had a good gig down here and I screwed that up royally.  The absolute worst part of the entire debacle is that Mini-Chooch is getting deported too.  However, he isn’t allowed to go to the U.S. with us, he has to go back to Panama.  He almost had to go to Bolivia, but I managed to convince them since I retrieved Carlos Ruiz’s DNA in Panama and Real Chooch is Panamanian, then he should go back to be with his people.

Sigh...

Sigh…

So the only good news is that although I’ll still be displaced, I’ll much less so.  I’m not sure where exactly we’ll end up.  Maybe I’ll take my talents to South Beach (PhML).  I’ve worked a deal for a voluntary deportation so we can stick around for a couple more weeks and we won’t have to leave immediately.  I’ll keep you all posted on how it goes, but just keep SMPhHing in my honor and start a prayer circle for the Phans.

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About Displaced Phan

Displaced Phan is a Philly Sports obsessive residing in places not named Philadelphia. Send Lager, soft pretzels, and Tastykakes.
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