PH-YOU TIM TEBOW

teblowNFL journeyman-backup quarterback, Tim Tebow (above, crying), accepted a deal today to become “Stupid” Tom Brady’s backup in New England.  Normally, I wouldn’t give a quarter of a damn about this.  However, that SOB, Tebow turned down an offer to play for the pride of Philadelphia, your first-place Philadelphia Soul.

How could Tim Tebow (below, frenching teammate) do such a thing?  He could have attained Arena Bowl glory instead of playing garbage time minutes in Brady’s shadow.  SMPhH.  That bum.  This is unforgivable.  I mean who would want to play for the Patriots?  They haven’t won a title since 2005 when they beat…wait a minute, I don’t like where this is headed.  My point is that the Soul won in 2008, so they’re obviously the better choice because they’ve been World Phucking Champions kind of recently.

Tim-Tebow-Demaryius-Thomas-kissIt’s probably a good thing that the Patriots don’t come to Philly this year, because Tebow (below, sizing up new teammate) would probably get a D-cell to the dome, since he won’t be wearing a helmet because he won’t see the field.

tebow-brady-kissLet’s Go Soul!  Go to Hell, Tebow.

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About Displaced Phan

Displaced Phan is a Philly Sports obsessive residing in places not named Philadelphia. Send Lager, soft pretzels, and Tastykakes.
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